There are many pathologies that affect people in different ways, it is hard to understand a stranger’s life when we have not lived whatever it may be going through. As from that premise, journalist Catherine Burns, from the BBC, talked to a pedophile looking for understanding on how these people, who are constantly judged and seldomly heard.
The interviewed is in his early twenties, and he describes himself as “the weird guy”, when, he looks very much like an ordinary guy.
For safety reasons, he asked Burns for his identity to be kept in private.
The young man tells how he has always felt attracted towards younger boys up to 15 years old. Also, he explains that he would never be capable of hurting a child, because he feels that what he feels for them is the necessity of taking care of them, not hurting them.
He describes himself as a regular guy. Who enjoys going to the cinema with his friends, playing videogames and having a quality time with his loved ones. However, deep down he feels different and he can’t explain to himself why, since he was a little boy, has he ever had feelings for younger boys.
“It all started when I was 13, I felt attracted for boys younger than me and I could not understand why. I believed that a “pedophile” was only a term for old men. But as I was growing older, I started to realize I still liked younger guys, even younger than before.”
The young man recognizes himself as a “anti-contact pedophile” and admits he knows many others like him, men and women that feel attraction towards kids but know that abusing them is wrong.
“It upsets me on the news they show stories of sexual abuse to minors, that’s the reason why I wanted to do this (the interview). Many times, the “pedophiles” that we see on the news aren’t even pedophiles, just people that hurt children under other pathologies. I’d kill myself before hurting a child. What I feel for them is the necessity of protecting them, of loving them.”
It is important to highlight that there are many “anti-contact” groups to help other people who live with the pedophile condition. Often, they are people who feel a deep sensation of emptiness that cannot fill, that cannot ask for help without the risk of being pointed at and even jailed, thus, they create these groups, regularly on clandestinely under the strictest anonymity regulations to tell how they feel and to deal with this problem day after day.